Finding “Me” in Menopause: An MHT Journey

“50 is the new 40.”  

That’s what the social media universe was saying, and I had no reason not to believe them. At 50, I was looking and feeling pretty darn good — even without splurging on private trainers or pricey, celebrity-endorsed anti-aging products. I was still able to slip — with just a few bounces — into my skinny jeans.

I was still singing at the top of my lungs, watching live bands that even my kids think are cool. Still braving the ice on the slopes of Vermont — on a snowboard. Yeah, while the number 5-0 was a little scary, the reality simply wasn’t. 

Then menopause hit. And 50 suddenly felt more like the new 65. 

The onset of menopause 

I’d known menopause was coming, but somehow I wasn’t ready for what it would actually be like — even though I’d witnessed plenty of good friends experience it already. Watching a friend start fanning herself with a laptop in the middle of conversation and actually understanding what her body was going through are two different things. I was focusing on what I saw right in front of my eyes, not studying up on what was happening on the inside and why.  

It’s not like there’s a “health class” for this hormonal change like there was when we were in middle school. In fact, 10-year-old boys probably knew more about periods than my middle-aged friends and I knew about menopause. We just knew it was yet another thing that we had to tolerate. Because (cue the snark) the thousands of days of menstruating throughout our lives up to this point weren’t enough.  

Recognizing the symptoms 

Not sure if you’ve seen the video of the woman sitting in the stands outside in the cool air as steam literally radiates from her head, but if you’re a menopausal woman, it’s likely hit your algorithm. It really is crazy, and when I first saw it, I remember laughing. I mean, objectively speaking, it was funny — even the woman herself found humor in it.  

But as the video popped up again and again in my feed, I spent a little more time thinking about what in the world was happening inside this woman’s body? Whatever it was, I realized, it was also happening in mine.  

My own body had a mind of its own these days. It started with flashes of heat that taunted me at the most inopportune times. It was like I was a furnace with an on/off switch that I couldn’t reach. And the flashes came in waves. I’d experience them for a few weeks, then they’d disappear for a couple months. I’d think I was in the clear, only for the cycle to begin again.  

Sleeping became a challenge, too — in large part because these waves of heat loved to not-so-gently jolt me awake. Add to that the cloudy head, achy joints, dry, itchy skin (that I even mistook for a yeast infection!), and a well-formed muffin top, and it was clear — I was officially an old lady. 

Explore menopause hormone therapy (MHT) 

Only I wasn’t. Not at heart. It was just that what was happening to me physically was holding me back. My estrogen and progesterone levels were rapidly dropping, and with them so was my confidence. But it didn’t have to be that way. There was a solution, and it wasn’t just to wear layers.  

It was menopause hormone therapy (previously known as hormone replacement therapy (HRT)). While we, as females, still have to endure oh-so-much, menopause symptoms don’t have to be one of them.  

MHT wasn’t something my fairly progressive doctor brought up. I researched it on my own. I read up on how it worked, reviewed the flawed studies, listened to my friends encouraging first-hand accounts.  Here’s a little of what I learned.  

What’s happening inside our bodies is that the ovary, which is responsible for producing estrogen, starts to not work as well, eventually leading to greatly reduced estrogen levels and a stop in ovulation. The first part of this process, when the estrogen levels are fluctuating, is called perimenopause. This is when your period might be irregular and most people experience some menopause-related symptoms. 

Menopause officially begins when you’ve gone 12 consecutive months without a period. The day after that marks the start of postmenopause.  

But if your period returns before reaching that 12-month mark — even in month 11 — you reset the clock and start counting from month one again. No shortcuts here. Mother Nature plays by her own rules.  

But MHT can be a tool to help you get through it. The studies many of us have heard about were conducted back in 2002. The findings at the time claimed that the negative effects of HRT outweighed the benefits, which (somewhat understandably) created panic among women and their doctors alike.  

Later studies and re-evaluation of the data, however, determined that “HRT in younger women or in early postmenopausal women had a beneficial effect on the cardiovascular system, reducing coronary disease and all-cause mortality.”  

And today, the Menopause Society goes so far as to claim that “hormone therapy remains the most effective treatment” for hot flashes as well as vaginal dryness and irritation, and has even been “shown to prevent bone loss and fracture.” 

So, yeah, I asked for it.  

Making the decision 

Interestingly, my doctor neither tried to talk me into or out of MHT. She wasn’t indifferent, she just wanted to make sure I was confident in my (personal) decision. I did, I said, and voila, a prescription was in hand. 

The outcome 

Truth be told, I did — and still do — think about some of the stigma attached to MHT. And I have friends who opted out, even though they thought they could benefit – mostly because of a family history of cancer and not wanting to take the extra risk. I get it. If I’d had that same history, I’m not sure I would have gone through with it either. Or maybe I would have. It’s hard to say. 

All I know is I made the right decision for me. Hot flashes stopped, I slept a through the night and brain fog cleared (though some “senior moments” remain). Mentally and physically, I don’t just feel closer to 40 again, I feel like myself again. 

Of course, every person is different and has their own journey. You should discuss menopause hormone therapy with your own doctor to see if it may be right for you.